Make sure it is equipped with a magic shield, Present-Torpedoes (Both normal and large presents), Jingle-Bell-Beam-weapons.
It should also be able to scan for good and bad captains and of cause the faster-than-light drive, and a sublight engines to fly between starbases, and the ability to dock with plasma-exhaust so santa can come into the ship with all the presents a good captain can wish for:
- Dilithium crystals
- Phaser rifles
- Comm-Badges
... and of cause access codes to the self destruct.
I love unoriginal ideas... Keep it up 
