Wow - i figured that the splotchy thing would be easy to figure out.
1) On an empty layer: Filter > Render > Clouds
2) On the same layer: Filter > Artistic > Cutout (adjust settings as you want)
3) Create a Gradient Map adjustment layer
4) Clip the gradient map adjustment layer to the clouds/cutout layer (hold down alt and click between the two layers in the layer palette).
5 optional) For the gradient map I actually used two different shades of grey that are close to center, ie: 160,160,160 and 96,96,96 - I then created a solid color layer above that and changed it to overlay at 75%. Also clip this layer to the Cloud/Cutout layer.